all these posts about hot mess that is Jedi Apprentice Qui Gon Jinn reminded me of a fic idea that was stalking me for some time, and which breed one particularly amusing image:
TCW-era Anakin, having involuntarily time-traveled to past with seemingly no way back, having his mind blown by tiny Initiate Kenobi
even better, the amusing role-reversal of
Yoda: no one to train Obi-Wan, there is. to Corps, he will go.
Anakin: NO YOU CANNOT, HE MUST BE TRAINED
Anakin, with pretty much zero idea about how this mess went down originally, unknowingly tag-teaming Qui-Gon together with Yoda to pester him about taking a Padawan. only to make Qui-Gon more obstinate because imagine how he’d take to this random baby-faced Knight’s meddling when he wouldn’t listen to the Grandmaster of the Jedi Order
(also, Anakin’s attempts at subtle meddling is the most ungraceful thing you can imagine)
i imagine the final confrontation going roughly like
Qui-Gon: I won’t take Kenobi as an apprentice
Anakin: but-but-but he’s go so much potential! he’ll be a great Jedi!
Qui-Gon: well if you think so then why won’t you take him as a Padawan? hah. check and mate.
and he saunters off, leaving gobsmacked Anakin there, who’s all ‘fuck fuck i fucked up’ because as far as he knows, he’s the only different thing about the situation, so logically him being there somehow made Qui-Gon not want to apprentice Obi-Wan
so while he can stand around and continue being “QUI-GON WHAT THE FUCK”, he’s got to fix this somehow asap because Obi-Wan must be trained
and that’s why he turns around (full of indignant ‘WELL QUI-GON MAYBE I WILL’), and immediately asks Obi-Wan to be his Padawan.
hilarity ensues.
There is a very evil part of me that wants to see an Anakin-trained Obi-Wan meet canon Obi-Wan.
It could be hilarious or disastrous, depending on several factors, mainly how old is the alternate Obi-Wan. Right now, I have only vague ideas about what kind of person he’d end up being. They would blow each other’s mind either way.
Anakin’s Master is probably this mysterious, wise abstract figure to alt!Obi-Wan, bc Anakin would definitely go “MY Master used to say…” every time he had to lecture him about something, and he always looked so smug about it. Well, now he knows what was so amusing to Anakin. Sooo clever, having him lecture himself in a roundabout way.
Canon Obi-Wan would probably discover his counterpart has some very… unique ideas about Jedi philosophy, at the very least.
It so weird. And awkward. But mainly weird.
Anakin goes to lie down somewhere. That much concentrated Obi-Wan is hard to handle.
This is amazing and I want it so bad.
i wish this was a thing, it would be epic and awesome
i would also love to see Qui-Gon watching this wet-behind-the-ears-powerhouse-with-no-rudder-Knight flail with a tiny-stubborn-angry-talented-Padawan, then meddling because he just can’t help himself and they’re both what could be termed ‘pathetic life forms’ especially when they’re both drenched and looking forlorn after a supposedly easy mission goes belly up
A little bit down the line and Qui-Gon has realised he’s somehow ended up with not only one pseudo-Padawan but two of them
Yoda is quietly laughing his ass off and not even bothering to hide it
Okay but canon!Obi-Wan getting thrown back as well, meeting them all and he’s just wtf-ing it all over the place because “WHAT THE HELL ANAKIN! I WAS BAD ENOUGH AS A PADAWAN TO QUI-GON! WHAT THE FUCKS!” and Anakin is like “WELL I FUCKED UP AND I HAD TO FIX IT IT’S NOT MY FAULT OKAY!”
Qui-Gon is just “wait what? I did teach you” and Canon!Obi-Wan is like “uh yeah” while alt!Obi-Wan just straight up WRECKS SHIT because omfg Obi-Wan trained by Qui-Gon is sneaky and destructive and reckless but dressed up in sophistication. Obi-Wan trained by Anakin however is sheer, unadulterated chaos.
Chaos I tell you.
Mace legit considers retiring via lightsaber to the chest because “fucking hells NO” while Yoda just lets them run wild because it’s fucking hilarious to him the little bastard
Palpatine get skewered by two Obi-Wan’s, an Anakin and a Qui-Gon for good measure and wtf-ing it into an explosion of goop and evil
Anakin who sneakily freed himself and his mom in this alt!verse with alt!Obi-Wan actually fucking giving him advice and tips and “I would not recommend you do that, killing him won’t free your- uh- them”
Gods the galaxy would never be the same.
no, and neither would the Council – they’d be just about used to the shenanigans caused by this hell team of Knight Skywalker and Padawan Kenobe, they’ve realised that these two are basically loose canon that you point in the general direction of the problem and pray (and probably take note of where Jinn is standing, because he’s at the point he always knows where to get the best seat to supervise/pass remarks/point-and-laugh without getting caught in the crossfire)
Orig!Obi rocks up, they (ok, mainly Mace) think, ok, fine, we can deal with another blunt instrument…
But no, they have a civilised, courtly, polite gentleman Knight on their hands, he’s at ease and respectful at Council meetings and in teaching classes, he’s modest and calm, he even manages to temper the excesses that Jinn and Skywalker specialise in. This baffles them but they don’t look a gift eopie in the mouth.
On review, Mace regrets that choice.
This older Kenobi manages to herd cats, and gets not only Skywalker and mini!Kenobi to go where he wants them to, but also Jinn, and it is like watching a ambulatory avalanche of destruction. The resulting paperwork is horrific, and taller than Yoda, who claims that he can’t read because he’s hurt his stomach muscles laughing so much. The Senate keeps trying to pin the Intergalactic-Brat-Pack down, but they get dazzled by the Negotiator who somehow manages to walk away without any penalty for the destruction they can’t quite pin on him, but also has the Trade Federation paying for it. Also, that Senator from Naboo disappeared in suspicious circumstances, and nobody can prove anything… Generals don’t only plot large battles, they also need to know how to cut an enemy off at the source.
Alt!Obi is taking notes, he kinda likes the idea of being a sophisticated space pirate that pretends to be a space monk, and that’s what Orig!Obi kinda looks like
Shmi rolls her eyes at her boys and insists on regular visits (yes, Ani, especially if she’s on Tattooine). Older Qui-Gon is quite taken by this self possessed and elegant Master who has managed to beat every record of upending the Council that Jinn was proud of, and look self effacing while he does it, and he’d like to see more. However, since Skywalker and Orig!Obi talked about the original timeline, Skywalker is trying to burn a hole in Jinn’s head in retaliation for sins that haven’t happened in this ‘verse, and he’s been a pretty amazing cockblock. Orig!Obi has yet to notice
Anakin is sure he’s lost control of this mess, but still can’t pinpoint where. he will take a nap
I’m fucking screaming holy shitting hells *smushes face in pillow and screams*
.
“What did you do?”
Mace’s voice echoes the sheer horror the entire Council is exuding – except Yoda, there’s just mirth there – as they stare at Obi-Wan and he can’t help but raise an eyebrow, face perfectly serene.
“As I was instructed,” Obi-Wan replies, voice level and so very polite it instantly has half the Council on edge. They’ve learned not to be idle, or busy being horrified, when the level of politeness from Master Kenobi ramps up.
They’ll be lucky to leave the room sane even with their increased wariness.
Qui-Gon stands by his side, safely exempt from the horrified questioning from the Council. Anakin is stood behind him and padawan Obi-Wan is beside him, staring at the older version of him, eyes drinking in everything.
The Council is more terrified of that sharp-eyed attentiveness in padawan Kenobi’s gaze than they are the master staring at them calmly.
They can barely handle this devastating blend of Jinn’s maverick tendencies, Kenobi’s born tenacity and this ruthless negotiating ability. Mace would consider Kenobi the best Jedi they’ve ever had were it not for the fact that he wants to throw himself from the tower in sheer dumb-struck frustration.
“You were instructed to obtain the intelligence for the Senate on the matter of the Trade Federation blockade.” Mace near bites out, staring hard at Obi-Wan who just – gods be damned – raises that eyebrow a smidge higher. “You were not instructed to dismantle the Federation’s primary droid control ship and detain two members of the senate!”
“The intelligence was obtained and relayed back to the Temple by Anakin,” Obi-Wan says casually, as though he were commenting on the weather. “We cannot be held accountable for the actions of the Trade Federation upon discovery of Jedi aboard the control ship. I believe the phrase ‘they started it’ is an accurate summary of our necessarily, defensive actions.”
Anakin shifts on the spot, fighting a grin. His master is such a fucking shit. His padawan looks at him, eyebrow raised in perfect mimicry of his elder self and- fucking hells, did Obi-Wan perfect that at birth?
“Defensive?” Master Yoda near fucking cackles, eyes bright with glee. Obi-Wan’s gaze switches to the small master. So does everyone else’s. “Necessary it was to destroy a whole ship mmm?”
Obi-Wan’s eyes are sharp with something that has always made Anakin incredibly cautious. The last time he saw that gleam in his master’s gaze he spent weeks on a ground campaign while Obi-Wan did some of the most reckless shit in their entire master-padawanship.
Qui-Gon’s amusement, carefully obscured to all but the four of them in the centre of the room, tells Anakin that the older master has quickly come to recognise the same… danger associated with that look.
“Well it certainly removed the blockade. Detaining Nute Gunray prevented the Trade Federation from calling for backup. And there was no loss of life; that’s always nice,” Obi-Wan responds.
Anakin swears he can hear the vessels in Mace’s head popping.
He’s kinda proud of the level of incredulity and frustration his master produces. And so politely as well.
The way the eyes of the Obi-Wan by his side are gleaming however gives Anakin pause. Shit.
Qui-Gon dealt with Obi-Wan the first time when he developed this unique skill. And now Anakin was going to be dealing with two of his master: one of whom was infinitely more like Anakin than was strictly safe.
Obi-Wan as a Jedi Master was devastating.
But Anakin clearly recalled how downright terrifying it had been watching his padawan with his master, working together: one knowing everything about the other, even though there were differences.
Master Obi-Wan working with himself as a padawan was literally an apocalypse for their opposition.
With Anakin and Qui-Gon added into the mix… well, the ‘four horsemen of the apocalypse’ from that quaint storybook his padawan had picked up on a mission came to mind.
Anakin kinda felt sorry of the Council as he watched Obi-Wan play them like instruments, to the point where he was honestly considering stepping in just so Mace wouldn’t actually throw himself from the tower.
Yoda kicked them out before he could however, declaring they needed to go to the healer’s and get checked out before retiring to their quarters.
“Cause more property damage you will not hmm?” Yoda says, giving Obi-Wan a look that Obi-Wan returned.
“Not unless it’s necessary Master Yoda,” Obi-Wan says, bowing. The Council relaxes but Obi-Wan’s not done yet “There’s so much paperwork to fill out for each individual act, it’s less effort to remove the property all together.”
Anakin grins, Jedi rules be damned.
look at this gem, look at this beauty, while I try to disentangle my hand from inside my mouth where it was keeping the laughs in to not scare the new roomie in the middle of the night
fic idea
Published
There's a Mirror on the Wall 